My life is a tragedy...

....one year behind the course it SHOULD be on. :(

One year. One year and I could be married. One year and no more "proper" boundaries keeping us from being close.

One year and these nights would end in joy and closeness rather then frustration and longing.

One year.

KAAAAARK I need more wine.


~Kitten

I have a boyfriend.

You read right.... I have a BOYFRIEND. And he's SO supercute and sweet and romantic and perfect and... I could go on for DAAAAYS.

He's also VERY respectful of the fact that I'm still only fifteen and he acts COMPLETELY appropriately. (Sometimes I wish he DIDN'T but I can't help but love how sweet and noble he is.) We spend a lot of time together, we share a lot of interests but also have a lot of our OWN interests... like I'm TOTES into fashion and he could care less about it, but he still watches red carpet ceremonies with me because he knows I like them. He is so sweet, and encouraging... and we have plans to go camping and fishing soon! I can't WAIT.

Did I mention I'm totally, completely, absolutely in love?

And that he kinda sorta proposed? YES LIKE WHOA! I said yes, DUH. We're waiting the proper length for an engagement before marrying though, because we're mature and stuff like that. So next year when I'm sixteen we'll get married (probably on Naboo cause 16 is the legal age of consent there, WOOHOO!)

Yeah.... life is good, even if the Trio DID take off again. Whatever, they're adults that can handle themselves. And Anakin left me a credit card for emergencies SO I CAN BUY ANYTHING!! No, just kidding, I buy like groceries and stuff.

Though there's a pair of Louboutins that is testing my resolve something FIERCE...

Anyway, there's your update. KITTEN'S LIFE IS WONDERFUL!


~Kitten

......wow......

I don't even have words for.... just.....


Woooow. Heeeeeee.....


<3

OMM YAAAAAY!!!!!

....I'm drawing again. :D My art block has lifted!

Still sore but my sister says this is what we're bred for as Echani, and it's certainly getting to be comfy...

Lyric IS NOT PREGNANT! SQUEE!!! And Ani is totally single again and stuff. And he probably won't be dating for a while... I mean she really is a bad example of women.

must grow faster
must grow faster

But... he's happy. And I'm happy. And we're both working on music stuff, so when I get to move back in with him and Qui-gon we'll maybe like... write some music of our own. :D

Did I mention HOW KARKING HAPPY I AM RIGHT NOW!?

~Kitten

So maybe not TOTALLY over...

My older sister is kicking my ASS on a daily basis, but it's actually kinda of... fun? I'm sleeping better cause I'm tired, and I've seen her naked now... (It's not freakish, actually Echani train naked, which is kinda cool) ...MAN she has the most amazing body I've ever seen. Like... she's solid muscle, but not like body builder big, just all lean and tight and AWESOME. I totally wanna look like that!!

Also? Man I hope I have boobs like her cause JEEZE.

Where was I? Oh, right. Training to become a fit, asskicking Echani warrior or something. Tiring.

Food here is REALLY good, Obi-wan makes everything from scratch and it's all SO yummy. Everyone is pretty cool about me staying here, though it's... weird sometimes. Caffa LOVES the kittens, I love watching them all play and snuggle up together. Kinda makes me hope someday I can have someone to be like that with.

Texted with Ani a bit... he's still at least kinda talking to me, and he said he misses me. Which is good cause I miss him. He's my best friend in the whole galaxy. I even miss the stupid things, like him calling me Brat and flicking my hair and mocking me. But.... maybe the slutskank isn't ACTUALLY knocked up, and maybe once I'm trained enough to keep practicing on my own.... maybe I can go back to Ani and Qui-gon and... things can go back to the way they were before.

~Kitten

P.S. AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHH OMM OMM OMM I NEVER NEEDED TO
SEE THAT EVER WHY WOULD THEY DO THAT IN THE LIVING ROOM!?!?!?!?!?
EYEBLEACH, STAT!!!! AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

My life is basically over.

I got sent away.
Ani got his girlfriend pregnant.
I kissed him. KISSED him. WHAT WAS I THINKING?
And don't you dare yell at him, he didn't kiss back.
He's never gonna talk to me again.
Now I gotta live with my older sister, her Anakin, and Obi-wan.

Because I'm too much of a kark-up to keep around.

Oh, did I mention my transport ALMOST CRASHED!??! I almost wish it had, then no one would have to worry about me ruining their lives anymore.

My life is over.

~Kitten

I miss him already.

Love.

You don't need a holiday for it.

If you love someone, don't be afraid to let them know. You never know when someone hasn't heard it in a really long time... or when they won't get to hear it again for a really long time. People take for granted what it's like knowing someone loves them; knowing someone out there holds them in their heart even when they're gone. And no one really knows what it's like to live without that feeling until you do. And it's awful.

So if you love people, don't wait for a day of flowers and chocolates and cards, just look them in the eyes and say you love them.

You never know who badly needs to hear it.

~Kitten

KARKING HELL.

Well my hair is brown now. I needed a change.

Also... I'm totes grounded AGAIN 'cause Qui-gon cought me smoking. WHATEV MAN, like, everyone smokes. Even HE smokes, it's just a different kind of smoke, if you catch my drift. THATS okay but cigarettes aren't?

HYPOCRISY.

Ani is totally making all this noise learning to play the guitar, which is SO annoying. (Okay, actually he's pretty good already but don't let it get to his head.) He's probably writing a song for his stupid new girlfriend. Who IS a skank, and Marly who I met at the mall (WHICH I DON'T CARE IF YOU FIND UNCOOL, I LIKE GOING) said she TOTALLY gave a bunch of guys BJs in the mall bathroom and then had to have her stomach pumped. EWWWWW. She probably has Corellian Herpes and shit. And Marly said last week that someone saw her get into the back seat of some Twi'lek dude's car. "Helping him find his contact lens." BULLKRIFF.

Anyway stupid Valentines day is tomorrow. I'm totally going to the mall to drop water balloons on the heads of cute couples. Don't worry, I'll be conscious of the holiday and using pink and red balloons.

I don't know why I even blog anymore. NO ONE READS IT ANYWAY.

~Kitten

I've decided...

I hate boys, I hate skirts, I hate makeup and I HATE the idea of Valentines Day. It's stupid. Some dumb day where if you're alone you're a loser? I think all those girls who NEED a boyfriend are idiots. You're only cool if you have a guy around? Whatever, that's treating guys like an accessory that completes your stupid outfit. Go suck your stupid lollipops and show off for the guys and try to make them go to the club and stuff so they can get laid, I DON'T NEED YOU OR YOUR STUPID BOYFRIEND.

I cut off my hair today, it looks dumb because I did a bad job of it but WHATEVER. I'm tired of getting headaches because my hair is heavy and I was only growing it out because boys like girls that have long hair. I don't care if I look like a stupid boy now, it's not getting in my face as much now. And baggy clothes? THEY ARE COMFY. So WHATEVER. Just because I bought something at Hot Topic doesn't automatically mean I'm a "poser," I refuse to conform to your stupid rules about nonconformity.

Now if you'll excuse me, I'm going to go play on my PSP.

~Kitten

P.S. I also hate sluts.

SIGH

I need a girl friend to talk to. I am SOOO confused.

GRRRRR....

My Birthday...

........Best. Day. EVER.

...................Heehehehe.......

......I'm not tellin you why either. ^.^


~Kitten

Tatooine.

It is sandy, hot, dry... hot.... sandy... And I actually kinda like it. I've totally got a tan now, apparently my skin tans like... a light caramel color. I've never been tanned before, I didn't know what color I'd be when I did.

It's kind of a dangerous world though, Leia went for a walk and got attacked by some... get this... sand people. And no... not what you're thinking. They weren't made of sand.

She got beat up pretty bad, Ani was really worried about her all night and never left her side. His mom said she thought she'd be okay though...

Ani's mom is the NICEST person I've ever met! Well... she's tied with Miss Disco. And Miss Leia. Who are also REALLY nice. But she seems to like me and I told her a secret and she's keeping it but she told me things about it that make me smile. ^.^ Good things.

Master Kenobi is trying to get the money together to buy Ani's mom so she can be free and start a life somewhere less hot, sandy and dry. I KNOW he'll manage it, and then Ani will never have to worry about her ever again! He's smiled SO much since we got to see her, he loves her so much and she loves him so much.... it's wonderful. I wish he would be this happy all the time.

I hope someday someone could love me that much...

~Kitten

Gonna visit Ani's mom!

I don't know if the Force listens when you ask it for things, but it seems to have heard me! I asked it for Ani to be happier, and I thought the only way that would happen would be if he got to see his mom.

And she has a comm now!! And we're gonna go visit her on Tatooine!! Ani has been smiling since she called.... I love seeing him happy. It always seems like the whole universe wants to mess with him, but for once things are going right. :)

Maybe I can get a tan while we're there... I have a new bathing suit and everything!It's gonna be GREAT!

~Kitten

I'm having a birthday!

For reals! The older Kit found it out yesterday and told me... I'm going to be FIFTEEN on the thirtieth. Miss Leia thinks it's a good idea to have a big birthday party since I've never had one before, so I'm making a list of people to invite!

I really like it on Leia's ship, too. Qui-gon finally messaged today and said someone came to the planet we were on looking for us, so that was kinda scary, but he says we're safe with Leia for now and he's taking care of my puppy (WHO I SO MISS :C) for now. He'll let us know when he has a new safe place. Right now I really like being on Leia's ship, Allana is really sweet and Leia is helping me with girl stuff!

I saw a doctor specially for girls, I was REALLY nervous but Leia took me to a woman specialist and she was REALLY nice and professional. She said that my body is racing to catch up now that I'm eating right and all, so all the changes are normal. I also got like FOUR shots for different stuff, and one for birth control NOT FOR SEX but because it's recommended for girls my age. Whatev. At least the doctor said I'll stop having cycles while on it. No more sending Ani for tampons.

Ani. I kinda sorta accidentally walked in on him in the shower. THAT was embarrassing. But I think we're okay now. We wound up both sleeping on the couch... is it silly that it's the best night's sleep I've had... ever? I always wake up scared a few times a night, but last night I just... slept.

I like having a best friend. (And it doesn't hurt that he has a cute butt. :D)

~Kitten

Sleepover!

So since we're ungrounded, Master Jinn said Ani and I could stay out (as long as it's with Leia Solo who's really trustworthy.) It was fun! We watched a holo of Mr. Solo hula dancing which was REALLY funny, but then miss Leia got all embarrassed because her husband filmed them wrestling. I don't get what the big deal is, Ani and I wrestle all the time when we're fighting (he always wins though cause he's bigger then I am) although we do wear a LOT more then Miss Leia and Mr. Solo were.

And there was popcorn with extra butter! And Ani was drinking something called "mountain dew" which sounds gross. I don't care if it DOES come from a mountain, dew still sounds yucky for drinking.

Then Allana woke up for a bit, so we made faces and talked a bunch! She's really cool, and really lucky to have so many people that love her. I don't even have ONE person to love me. But whatever, we can't all be lucky enough to have a big family, right? She wants a little brother or sister, I hope she gets to have one.

All this talk of family has me thinking about what Ani said about his mother. Since Master Jinn seems to think the council isn't actively searching for us, maybe he'd let us take a trip to Tatooine to see Ani's mom? She sounds really nice, and I think it would make him really happy to see her. I like when he smiles.

Today Miss Leia and I are supposed to go shopping so I can get a bra or two... my stupid sore chest is getting bigger, it even bounces when I run!! x.x BLEGH!

~Kitten

ANI GOT ME A PSP!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

EEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!!!!!
MY OWN PSP THAT I DON'T HAVE TO BORROW OR SHARE OR ANYTHING!!!!!!!!!!!!!

LOOOOOOOOOK!!!!!
IT'S PRETTY AND PINK AND AWESOME AND ANI IS THE BEST PERSON EVER!!!!

Oh AND we're ungrounded!! YAY!! This is THE BEST DAY!!

~Kitten

ATTENTION

If someone has a PRIVATE note pad they sketch on IT IS VERY RUDE TO GO LOOKING THROUGH IT WHEN THEY SAY NOT TO.

In other news, I'm not drawin anymore, it was a stupid idea anyway.

~Kitten

FOR THE RECORD

I am NOT drawing Anakin!! I am just drawing people and stuff out of my imagination. NOT Anakin and it doesn't even LOOK like Anakin so don't think it's him.

I DO NOT HAVE A CRUSH.

:P

~Kitten

Just a drawin.

Not quittin my day job, as Ani would say.
~Kitten

So I'm grounded...

I've never been grounded before. How long does this last? Does it mean I can't go out? Does ANYONE know what's going on?

In other news, my chest hurts. If THIS is what it takes to grow boobs, COUNT ME OUT. Why does EVERY part of becoming a "woman" involve pain? Seriously? I am half expecting to learn a girl's first kiss involves her sinuses detonating like gunpowder.

Since my LAPTOP got taken away (GRRRRRRR) I am learning to draw. I am not very good yet, everything looks like stick figures kinda. But I drew a picture of stick figure Qui-gon AND HIS HUGE LOUD NOSE. And stick figure Ani pretending to be all buff. (He's not buff.)


~Kitten

the letter Z

there is nuthing wrong with the letter Z. it should have more words. or more words should end with it. just think.

smells? SMELLZ
guts? GUTZ
pants? PANTZ

see whatI mean? I mean... hehe pants.

Um... AND NO MISS LEAI I DON'T HAVE A CRUSH ON ANAKIN OR HIM ON ME DSO STOP SAYING IT OMMMMMMMMMMMMZ.

~kittenZ

Can't sleep...

....had a nightmare. And Master Jinn is snoring. Seriously, I can hear him THROUGH THE WALL. :(

I really want...

....a PSP of my own. I've been playing on Anakin's all afternoon 'cause he's being super nice cause I'm in pain (even if he's pretending to be a jerkface).

It is really, REALLY fun! My allowance isn't that much, so I'm gonna be saving up a WHILE. Maybe if I offer to do more chores and stuff Master Jinn will give me a little more every week? I dunno. But I really want one so I can play and not feel bad 'cause I'm using Anakin's.



~Kitten

OMM

.....this is the weirdest morning ever. And my tummy hurts. :(

Okay, so, he's not that bad...

...when he's being nice.

Anakin (who is only Jerkface when he's being mean) was all upset earlier, but I think we made up and are okay for now. I never gave him a present for Christmas so I spent my allowance money to get him a box of hair dye and a journal with a thumb print lock. So I can't actually read his poems and stuff or whatever.

And then GAAAASP he made that face and I had to take a picture because he's ALMOST SMILING.

SHOCKING I KNOW.

And then he saw me take a picture and then scowled again, but it was nice while it lasted.

Oh, and I'm being more careful to spell right and stuff so I look less stupid, since he's helping me learn and it reflects poorly on him when I post stuff all wrong.

Qui-gon looks kinda happy since we're getting along for the moment, but I just got a warning look and he tapped his watch, so I think I have to go to bed soon. But when I am fourteen (or fifteen, I'm not actually sure how old I am) I am SO arguing for a later curfew.

So Qui-gon is still cool, my puppy is AWESOME, my writing is better and Anakin is kinda okay. There are worse people to be stuck with.

~Kitten

I AM NOT THAT SMALL!

STUPID ANAKIN AND HIS STUPID CALLING ME A MIDGET!!

Jerkface McStupid has his own blog now, where he... get this.... this is gonna rock your world... BITCHES ABOUT STUFF. Especially me. And his stupid hair. An his stupid ex-girlfriend who looks like me. Considerin how much he WHINES I can't blame her for breaking up with him. If I was old enough to date I SO wouldn't date Jerkface. And know what else he does? Mocks my height.

I am NOT that tiny!!! I am just a LITTLE small for my age but Master Qui-gon says I'ma get bigger soon 'cause I'm almos fourteen an that's when girls do most of their growing. Just because he's a GIANT (and skinny like a beanpole, I thot Jedi were s'posta be all buff an stuff?)

Caffa is still the awesomest puppy ever, he even chewed up Jerkface's shoes this morning, MAYBE that will teach him to put his stupid stuff away.

Master Qui-gon sighs at us a lot, but when I told him he should make a blog too he laughed a bunch and said that's stuff for young people. I don't know, he doesn seem that old to me, but I'm not so good at judging ages. For instance, I thot Jerkface must be FIVE given how much he cries, but supposedly he's like eighteen or so. I'M WAITIN TO SEE EVIDENCE OF THIS.

In conclusion, I am NOT THAT SMALL!!!!!!!!!!!!!

~Kitten

Part 2

Okay, Anakin wants me to inform you that he is not "going to beat the snot out of me" so please "don't call DYFS on him or Qui-gon will get pissed."

Also, he is checking my spelling because it is "like acid on the eyes to read."

And "stop quoting me or I will beat the sn-"


Okay no more quotes.


ANYWAY.

The first planet we visited was a really pretty one, without a lot of habitation... lots of grassland. You could see the fields as soon as we left the spaceport, it was REALLY pretty and there was SO MUCH SKY everywhere. There was a little city we stopped in where we got new clothes and stuff, we're not supposed to look like Padawans while we're in hiding. We stayed in a big open kind of house for a few days, and master Qui-gon has been teaching me meditation and stuff to get "attuned" to the force better. He's also teaching me to use a saber, but he's making Anakin help me with that since his fighting style... umm I think it's called form Vee? Oh. Form five. Shien. It's an aggressive style and he thinks it would work well for me.

(And I think he wants to teach Anakin more patience too.) And now Anakin is looking at me annoyed. Like he DOESN'T ALREADY KNOW THAT. Sheesh.

ANYWAYS I'm also getting better at lifting things with my mind, I don't have a problem with size as much as I have trouble gripping things. Master Qui-gon says I need to work more on focusing, so I have to pick up pebbles and put them in a cup. I still miss a lot but I'm getting better.

I miss Mrs. Gryphon a lot, she was really nice and taught me how to read in the first place. If not for her you wouldn't get to read my thoughts, and then where would you be, right? She's really nice and stuff, I hope she's okay. I miss Rose too, even though she's kinda little. I also miss Cerah, she was kinda becoming my friend before we had to leave. I hope she's okay too.

We left that planet last night, and I'm kinda sad about it, but I like the place we're at now! I can't tell you anything about it till we leave again, just in case. But when we move on, I'll let you know! And hopefully Anakin will get HIS OWN BLOG SO HE CAN STOP HOVERING OVER MINE.

Kay, bye!

~Kitten

Hi 'gain!

I got my comm to take picshurs! Is not very high qualty, but is pictures anyway!

Thaz An'kin lisnen to his iPod and ignorin me. He does a LOT of that. I guess his hair is died, I askt him why he has black hair an th'other An'kin has brownish an he got all mad an told me "nevur to mention that girlfren stealin asshole" ever again. Then he got all cranky 'gain an I took this picshur.

Then I ran 'way a'fore he could steal my comm.

This is Caffa, my puppy!! He's the BEST PUPPY EVAR! He dosen eat much an he's fun an bouncy and follows me EVERWHAR I go. I am rilly happy Obi-wan gave him to me.

Uh oh, An'kin is lookin at me funny. Um....





GOTTA GO I'LL POST MORE LATERRR...

Firs entry...

Qui-gon sez it's good practice t'write my thots down, an since Miss Disco gave me my own compact datapad WITH FULL KEYBOARD... MINE, I doan hafta share wif no one... I thot I culd mebbie write down th'stuff tha happens durin the day an then read it later so's I'll be a guud righter.

Qui-gon Jinn is my Jedi master, an he's teachin me t'use the Force. I'm not so good yet, but I kin kinna move things wif my mind now an I get feelins an stuff. But sometimes they're not feelins, just like... worries. He says I'll lern th'differnce 'ventually.

We hadta leave our 'partment cause th'Jedi doan want me to be trained an they think I'm speshul in th'force 'cause I somehow skipped thru time. So they wanted to take me away an Qui-gon din wanna let them. Before we left he got An'kin (not the older An'kin who's super nice to me an took care of me when that scary Jedi lady tried to grab me, th'other one who's not as nice and has black hair an is ALWAYS cranky.) 'Parently he thinks they might use An'kin too, so's he got him and brought him in hiding too.

So I can't tell you were we are, sorry.

Master s'gessted we disguise me as a boy, 'cause I'm small an iz not easy to tell, but An'kin got all mad an said "FIGURES" and stomped and complained about "effemelle" b'fore putting on his headphones an ignoring me. I doan think he likes me very much, but Qui-gon sez I juss remind him of someone who hurt him a bunch, an when he realizes I'm not really tha person he'll be nicer.

I doan think so tho, he has a bug up his butt thatz not goin no where.

So now we're in disguise an usin code names (can't tell you which ones tho, sorry) and hidin while learnin the Force. I kinda like it tho, because I git to see worlds that aren't all city. Caffa likes the grass.

OH I almos forgot, Caffa is my puppy that Obi-wan gave me! He's the best puppy EVER an he's my bes friend an he's nicer then An'kin but An'kin likes him too so I guess he's kinda okay. He sleeps with me at night an is very warm but his bref is TERRIBLE. An'kin says thaz normal for a puppy tho, so I gotta get used to it.

Ummmm I think that's all, we're boarding for a ship now so's I gots ta go. I'll post again when iz safe. BAI!

~Kitten (Thaz not my code name, juss what An'kin calls me.)